Make Me

Make Me
(June 2017)

Touch me
Grab me
Hold me
Make me stay

Notice me
Want me
Love me
Make me care

Hug me
Kiss me
Fuck me
Make me scream

Ignore me
Forget me
Leave me
Make me cry

Jenna

Jenna
(2011)
I'm writing this for you
Because smiles - you could use a few
I know there's a lot going on
Hang in there - stay strong
Crystal is your ex
You used to have sex
Sorry to say - she's a whore
It's time to close that door
Focus on your close friends
Don't let those be the ends
You work in a bingo hall
Not just old folk - ages of all
New York is where you're from
I lived there too - but Cali is my home
We've talked for over four years
It works nicely - since we're both queers
You used to be my almost
But no we're friends - let's toast!
Having exes does really suck
Bitches we used to fuck
Be happy we have each other
Yay! - Friends forever

Clarity

Clarity
(2011)
I seek clarity
But the more I think
The more muddled everything becomes
I analyze love
I ask why
Then I wonder how I ever know
How do I know anything to be truth
Can I even believe my own feelings
Maybe they are just exaggerating
Some version of like
The more I think
The heavier the fog becomes
And still
-I seek clarity

The New (old) Me

The New (old) Me
(early 2011)
Her love was like a dream
But I forgot to wake up
For three years I slept
The silence pounding in my head
I cover my ears and scream
I laugh
I cry
I dance
Anything to drown out the silence
I yawn
I stretch
I am ready to take on the world
I have no regrets
Everything I have ever done
Has brought me to today
The day that I will stop procrastinating
Being happy

Naked

Naked
(Early 2013)
I still love you
With all my heart
Without you I feel naked
Lost,
I miss what we once were
I miss what we could have been
What I don't miss
Is where we ended up
Somehow
What once gave me life, hope
Was hurting me
Killing me
Now the cold air hits my skin
I am terrified, naked
I still love you
I thought you were my destination
But it turns out you were
A part of my journey
I will always remember
Niagra Falls
Casa Loma
You, us
I still love you
Without you I feel naked

Two worlds

Two Worlds
Torn between two worlds
Two realities
Two boys
One holds the past
All the pain but also all the joy
The other holds me now
When I look at him I see the future
I see all the possibilities
How happy we could be
And also, the pain he could cause me
Caught between two worlds
Two realities
Two boys
And I just don't know
Where to go

Not an Invitation

If I post a photo like this

It doesn't mean I'm a slut

It doesn't mean I want to see your penis

It is not an invitation

For you to tell me how you want to fuck me

I am not intending to tease you either

I simply have large breasts

Sometimes

They don't fit well in cute clothes

And sometimes I don't care

I'm not modest

To me - nudity doesn't equal sex

So when I post a pic like this

If you have dirty thoughts

Keep them to yourself

This is MY body

I shouldn't have to cover it up

Just because YOU are weak

And can't resist being a pervert

When you harass women

YOU are the one with the problem

NOTHING we do is asking to be harassed

I am comfortable with who I am

Are you comfortable with who you are?

When I post a pic like this

I'm not trying to get sexual attention

I'm not fishing for compliments

I'm just being me

Uncensored

High Maintenance

High Maintenance

I have to be honest

I'm a lot to handle

Keeping me happy

Is a full-time job

I expect texts

Every hour or two

"Thinking about you"

"Miss you"

"Can't wait to talk later"

Short and sweet is perfect

I want to know where you are

And what you are doing

If I know in advance

That you will be unavailable

I won't stress

When I don't hear from you

You see,

I'm not unreasonable

I just need to feel important

Like everything I say

And everything I do

Is worth paying attention to

And I need compliments

Smart, pretty, funny, sexy...

I want to be everything

I have to be honest

I'm a lot to handle!

Are you sure I'm worth it?

Far From Perfect

Far From Perfect

Perfect
What does the word even mean?
I feel so flawed
I know I'm hard to handle
I know sometimes
I get way too emotional
I know I cry too much
And when my anxiety sets in
My self-esteem goes down the toilet
Sometimes I'm too loud
Sometimes I'm too quiet
I know I'm extra needy
I do need a LOT of attention!
Yet other times
I can't help but worry
About ALL the problems in the world
I'm also a little bit crazy-
Yes, sometimes that is fun
But it can also be challenging
I know I am a challenge
And I make things hard
But, sometimes I think I am amazing
I'm smart and funny
I love to laugh!
Some days, I even feel beautiful!
But deep down
I always remember
I'm human and I'm flawed
I can only hope
That to someone
I'm worth it!

Superpower

Superpower

I just found out
I have a superpower
I can be
Invisible
Maybe not to everyone
Maybe just to you
You look in my direction
But you don't see me
This power
I am trying to learn
To control it
I speak to you
But you don't hear me
If I can become invisible
Surely I can also become
Noticeable
Unmistakeably seen
So I come closer
To touch you
But you don't feel me
I have a superpower
I know I do
But I think
I'd rather
Not be so super
And instead
Just be
Me
Just be
Seen